Non-Existent

Well, now the fat is well and truly in the fire.

My mobile just rang and my first thought was, “who the hell is calling at 12.14am?”  Then I realized it would only be one place and I picked up the handset.  Sure enough, it was Vital Call.

They’ve had an activation of Mum’s alarm and haven’t been able to get hold of her, so they are sending an ambulance.  I’m betting she’s had another fall and without her hearing aids in, can’t hear them talking to her through the speaker.

Regardless, this is exactly what happened last October.  I got the alert, tried to call her solidly for two weeks and she blew me off and hasn’t spoken to me since for reason any sane person on the planet could possibly name.  Are we about to do an encore performance?

I will email Nicole from her carers and let her know an activation has occurred so they can assess Mum for any ongoing issues.  Since I’m 4 hours drive away, that’s about all I can do.

However, perhaps that was the problem last time.  I notified the carers that a fall had happened and they asked her about it.  She likes to withhold information from people so perhaps she was miffed that I let the cat out of the bag.  Well, if that’s the case, take me off the contact list for Vital Call dumbo, and I won’t know to tell anyone anything.  It’s not rocket science.

I’m supposed to be the next of kin contact providing I tell nobody anything – which is utterly ridiculous.

So, I’ll do my due diligence and send the email and will call them on Tuesday to be sure they have the message, in case Nicole is away on leave and nobody is checking her email.  

But I will not make the mistake of trying to call her to find out what has happened.  She obviously doesn’t want contact with me.  If there’s anything to know, the carers will call me and tell me what I need to know.

If this stupid old woman wants to sit up there bitching about me behind my back that I’m a “bad daughter” because I haven’t contacted her, well, that’s fine with me.  I cannot be offended by what I do not hear.

If she wants to do some drama about “I don’t care about her” because I’m not being in touch, well, it’s not like she’s tried to be in touch with ME either, is it?  There has been zero concern about me even with my serious issues which she is fully aware of but chooses to treat as non-existent.

Six months ago, she sent an email saying she would be in touch and she hasn’t been.  No email.  No call. Not even a friggin card at Xmas despite the fact that I sent her one.  So, this is a mess of her own making as far as I can see.  Neither my number and address has changed.  I have been contactable, she just hasn’t bothered.

And now, she’s in the same boat that she was last October.  She’s had a fall and will be waiting on me to contact her to fuss and shower her with attention because it’s ALL about her.  For the record, she’ll be waiting a long time.

She was at home the whole two weeks I kept ringing her and she refused to pick up the phone to speak to me.  I finally asked the carers to ask her to contact me and she sent that pithy email about how she’s having trouble with her eyes and can’t email me.  Well, if you pick up the phone and SPEAK, email becomes irrelevant, doesn’t it?

Worse, she can’t even make a case that the carers had to type the email for her because it written and sent after they’d clocked off for the day.  While you could stretch it and say MAYBE one of them typed it while they were there, why would they wait until after they left to send it?  If she couldn’t see, why would she be on her table to at all to realize they hadn’t sent it? 

The natural conclusion is that she typed it herself, which means she could see well enough and if she can type one, she could type another – or see to dial my phone number.  Nope, that was a weak pathetic excuse she thought I’d fall for because she honestly believes I’m a brainless moron. Well, thanks for THAT fine, loving compliment.

For two whole weeks while I repeatedly rang to find out how she was after her last fall, she refused to answer my calls and hasn’t made any effort to be in contact with me since.  And when I say no effort, I mean NO effort. Nada.  Zip.

If this is how she wants to play it, I can’t stop her.  I do think she’s being ridiculously dramatic and silly though.  It’s just childish attention seeking and I’m so totally DONE playing that game.  I’ve been doing it since the cradle.  Over 5 decades later, I’m fed up to the back teeth with it.

However, just because she might like to THINK I’m a brainless moron, does not MAKE me one.  I’m smart enough to realize that just because I can’t stop her playing it doesn’t mean I’m obligated to join in – and she cannot force me to.  All she can do is very enthusiastically extend the invitation.  I was suckered in throughout my entire childhood and even throughout a great deal of my early adulthood.  These days, I choose to decline the offer and I’m strong enough to follow through on my decision.

It does make me wonder just how long she’s going to perpetuate this insane drama though.  It’s already been six months.  Is she going for a nice round twelve months?  Or is she projecting a figure longer than that?  And just how satisfying can it be when she can’t see me ‘suffering’ over it as I’m no doubt supposed to do?

Clearly, I’m supposed to ‘break’ in this perverted game of chicken and keep trying to contact her until she’s good and ready to grace me with her presence.  That’s the power play and by withholding her presence in my life, I’m supposed to be utterly heartbroken and be having a meltdown because ooooh, mummy won’t speak to me. Oh really?  Ya THINK?  I haven’t had that particular anxiety in over 30 years and it’s not coming back any time soon.

I’m tired of being contacted in the wee hours of the night to be informed she’s had this or that mishap, when clearly none of my involvement is welcome in any way, shape or form.   Yet, she has me listed as her next of kin to be contacted when these situations occur.  

Why?  For what purpose?  Exactly what role does she want me to perform?  If you’re going to nominate a next of kin and then block them out completely from even knowing what happened, there doesn’t seem to be any point in having anyone nominated at all.  It’s like lighting a fire to keep warm, then throwing open all the doors and windows to let the bitter winter in.

I’m so frustrated and fed up that I’m about ready to send a letter to her asking to be removed from her next of kin list entirely, and then block Vital Call’s number on my phone.

I just don’t need this shit in my life on a recurring basis.  I certainly don’t need to be dragged through yet another of her attention seeking dramas keeping me dangling on the sidelines while she laps up the power play. 

It’s all about manipulation.  That’s what it’s always been about.  I’m done.  I refuse to play this game anymore.  I have MORE than enough of my own medical issues going on and I have neither the time nor energy to waste worrying about someone who is completely freezing me out.

If she all she wants from me the bare minimum of involvement in her life, that’s precisely what she’s going to get – with my compliments.  But she doesn’t get to interject herself back into my life whenever and however she wants so she can have me dangling on a string at the mercy of her mood.

Before anyone goes off the deep end and suggests that it’s not her fault she had a fall (and/or injury) and needs help, settle down.  I’m not suggesting it’s deliberate, although the amount of alcohol she consumes is certainly a major contributing factor.  It’s the rest of the game-playing I take umbridge with. 

I wonder if she’s remembered that I have a birthday rolling around in less than a month?  I don’t expect anything from her in recognition of it.  Not a card or a gift, let alone a goddammed phone call.  It’ll slide by ignored, just as Xmas did because I’m only important enough to be acknowledged in her life when I’m feeding her hunger by playing her dramatic games.

For the record, even though she’d blown off my calls for two solid weeks, sent me a pithy, pathetic email to try (and failed) to explain why she didn’t pick up the phone to me, and hasn’t been in contact at all since (not even a card at Xmas), I was still kind enough to make the overture and send her a card.  Waste of my time though.  She didn’t even call to wish me happy Xmas.   Since October, all I’ve had is total radio silence.

What she chooses to do now that there’s a second alert that I’m aware of, is going to be interesting.  I stopped writing this piece briefly, and have written and sent an email to her carers  That is about all I CAN do but at least nobody can accuse me of abandoning my responsibility as her Medical Power of Attorney.  I have done what I can to foster her best interests.  I have clean hands.

However, where my mother is concerned, especially with this no communication game she’s playing, I am beyond frustrated, fed up, irritated, and totally disappointed with her.  She’s In her 80s and by far old enough to have grown up and be able to conduct herself in a far more responsible manner.

She’ in her 80s and she lives alone in her house.  She absolutely OOES NOT want to be in a nursing home because she likes her independence.  She worries that if people think she can’t look after herself, we’ll all conspire behind her back to have her relegated to a home where she’ll be at the mercy of someone else’s rules.  Okay, I understand that.  I think it’s childish and just plain silly, but I get where she’s coming from. 

However, remaining at home by herself comes with a lot of risks which it it is incumbent upon her to recognise and address. Jumping people through hoops for her own satisfaction is simply abusive and utterly unacceptable, especially when they’re treeing t o help her out of concern for her.

It’s not like I’m in no position to closely identify.  God, I have my OWN issues that make living independently risky.  But how many favours am I doing myself by ignoring those risks and refusing help when it’s both offered and needed? 

Like an adult, I accept my situation and keep my medical team updated on a frequent basis along with those I have listed as my next of kin.  Only a total moron would do less.  If things really go south at any time, I’m going to NEED those people.  Keeping them in the loop is both common sense and necessity.  I’m not so egotistical and proud that I refuse to accept help when it’s both warranted and needed.

In the case of my mother, it’s not the medical issues that are the problem, but the way she uses them as fodder. This is why I am fed up to the back teeth with her using a very genuine risky situation as a tool by which she can keep me dangling while she indulges herself with attention seeking.  Enough is enough.

Adults Only

The other day, I saw an article on a news site about this guy who was being absolutely lambasted and trolled online because he opened a restaurant and set the condition as 18+ only.  In other word, it’s NOT a family eatery and children are not allowed.  Apparently, a great many people thought that it was unforgivably restrictive and that he had no right to impose such a condition.  Personally, and for the record, I think he had every right.

No restaurant MUST cater to a family dynamic.  It is up to the owner to decide what kind of venue they wish to run and they are absolutely entitled, and ALLOWED, to run it for adults only if they wish.

It’s no different to going to a cinema with a group of children and finding that some movies are restricted to adults only, and thus, admittance to children is not allowed. 

In the case of the eatery, if he wants to cater to adults and offer a fine dining experience for his patrons, he can.  Not everyone wants to eat out listening to screaming babies, or having children running amok in the place unsupervised “while the grown ups talk”, or even wants to try to eat watching some filthy brat doing disgusting things with their food.

Some adults actually want to dine in an atmosphere that is civilised and a break from children.  There are plenty of places where parents can take children out to eat and it does not have to be EVERY place that ever opens its doors and serves food.

For parents having a date night, it might be nice for them to be in a quiet atmosphere where they don’t have to listen to anyone’s children and can just have a quiet dinner together.  Date nights are a break from their own children but it’s not much of a break when they’re surrounded by someone else’s, is it?

Having thought about that and decided my opinion on the topic, I then watched a video on what makes someone an introvert.  I am one, and always have been.  I did lockdown without breaking a sweat because months without seeing anyone or going anywhere is my idea of heaven on a stick.  Then somehow, I got thinking about being in crowds and how hard I find that.

I went to two concerts last year – Elton John and Billy Joel.  The performances were great.  The crowds were my idea of hell. I simply despise being in a mob.  It makes me want to start screaming.  I never do though because if I did, I’d never stop and how do you explain to someone that you’re screaming because you’re in a crowd when obviously, if it’s that much of a problem, I shouldn’t have put myself there in the first place?

When I was finally old enough to date, the whole concept really confused me.  Of course, the bog standard was dinner and a movie, and by dinner, they meant something at a cheap eater like McDonalds. Sure, I did that, like everyone else and yes, I even enjoyed it.  I couldn’t do it now though unless it was a show with a really limited audience, such as a matinee.

I recall one date (and I’m sure I’ve spoken about it before) where I was asked out by a guy from one of the social clubs I belonged to.  They met once a month and I’d spoken to him each time over a period of probably 6 months, so when he asked, I accepted.

What he didn’t know was that I’m pathetic with names and faces.  I have people I work with today whose names I cannot recall.  However, I can talk to them and have a casual conversation and we get on fine because they’re not using my name either.  We just talk and if we started dropping names into the chatter, it would probably be really weird.  But I digress.

So, he came from Geelong which is about a 45 minute drive starting from the whole other side of town from me.  If you’re measuring that distance from where I was living at the time, it would have been almost 2 hours of driving.  We decided to split the difference, especially since neither of us drove a car.  We met in the city under the clocks at Flinders St Station. We both came in by train.

I stood there hoping he would see and approach me because not only could I not remember his name, but I also didn’t have clear recall of what he looked like either.  Thankfully, he did see me and approached me.  As soon as I saw him, I recalled his face but I couldn’t have picked him out of a crowd if it had to be the other way around.  That’s just not how my brain works.

Anyway, we had a bite at a café in Swanston St (which was the type of café that some of us in the social group referred to as a “choke and puke”) and then we went on to the movie.  This was all on a Saturday afternoon and we saw The Never Ending Story.  I loved it.  The whole date was magical. We walked, talked, held hands, had a great time.  Even though were in the city, it wasn’t overly crowded and I felt safe. That could never happen today.

These days, I feel smothered by crowds.  I can’t breathe in them.  I prefer places that are quiet and less trafficked.  Sadly, the same trope about going out for a dinner and movie seems to hold true today as it did decades ago.  Worse, some like to suggest going dancing after.  I can’t think of anything worse.

Did I ever talk about the time I met some girls at Crown Casino?  We met up and were still in the passages outside but within the building.  We found ourselves at a crossroads in the passages, a spot where they met and we had giant screens with bright flashy lights literally blaring down on us from each corner above.  I literally ran out of there because I knew it was either run or die.

It was just massive overstimulation which was made worse by the number of people around me, which I’d already found to be bad enough but was managing to cope with.  The screaming screens sent me over the edge and running was the only sane response I could come up with.

So, for me to go to a place where I’d literally have people pushing up against me from all sides, in a dark room where I couldn’t easily see the exits, and having blaring music pounding down on me from every angle, is just an horrific thought.  I can barely handle imagining it, let alone being amongst it.

Why does nobody every suggest a date to a fine eatery where there is no loud music (softer background music is nice though) and no children?  I agree, such places are incredibly hard to find but if you can, they’re gold to people like me.  I like dining out too but cannot handle family friendly places which are always chaotic and noisy.  I need a quieter venue which usually means adults only, and yes, that’s another reason why I support that restauranteur for his chosen type of venue.

If anyone wanted to impress me on a date, take me to an adults only venue for food where I can actually HEAR what’s being said to me and enjoy the company. 

Or take me to a beach and we’ll grab some  take out on the way there, sit and eat, then walk on the beach hand in hand, enjoying the feel of gritty sand under bare feet while we listen to the roar of the waves as they roll in.

Or maybe to a national park where we can eat at the picnic benches and then stroll through the greenery and maybe enjoy the sound of a bubbling creek.

THAT is my idea of heaven.

If you want to go top shelf and impress me, come on over to my place, bring some food and a couple of bottles of cola and we’ll play some board games and interact with great conversation for an evening.  Things like Scrabble, Trivial Pursuit, Duell, Othello, Gin Rummy, or any of the other dozens of great games I’ve got stashed away in the cupboard in my back room. 

Before anyone mentions it, I will not entertain anything vile and disgusting like Monopoly where you can only win by screwing over everyone else and the more you shaft them, the better your win.  I think that’s an utterly foul ethic and I refuse to play it. 

Coming over and sitting ignoring each other while a movie plays is boring as well.  I want to interact with my guest, not pretend they don’t exist. 

And people just don’t get about me.  I really CAN go months without “Going Anywhere” or “Doing Something” on my weekends.  In fact, mostly, my weekends are MY time and I guard them zealously.

I might agree to go out somewhere for a few hours ONE day, but not both.  I need my quiet time to detox. 

I am around people all day at work.  While I have my duties, I can pretty much set my own schedule for how I get through them.  I’m not micromanaged and I’m not given constant instruction.  I know what need doing and I’m largely autonomous in my role. 

I still have to interact with people throughout the day though, however, which I can find draining and why I need my personal time to myself at home.  There is nothing wrong with knowing my boundaries and limits and making sure I address them in my daily life.

Some weeks, when we’re really full on at work, I can find even going to the supermarket to be a challenge.  At those times, I arrange for home delivery rather than going out to scout supplies myself.  Whatever is easier on my nerves, wins.

Sharing my space with 3 cats is often crowd enough for me when I’m stressed.  I don’t need to come home to someone else’s issues or demands.  I certainly don’t need to come home and be cleaning house after someone who’s happy to make mess and never cleans it up.  I have that in ample quantity with the cats. I don’t need a human adding to the work.

When it comes to dining out, not everyone wants to be in a place full of children.  Doubly so if the parents are those lazy, checked out incompetents who have never taught their children how to be have in public.

There is nothing wrong with quiet venues, nothing wrong with taking a leap of faith and planning a date that doesn’t include a movie or dancing which, incidentally, are places where nobody can communicate at all. Surely, a date is supposed to give the couple a chance to interact?  Why would anyone WANT to go to places where that’s not possible and then later, gush about “what a great time” they had?

I understand that for some people, all that frenetic energy is fabulous and they thrive on it, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

A lot of people, however, don’t, and those people should also have places they can go where their needs can be catered to.

I enjoy the quiet in the world.  I like places without big crowds.  I prefer places where I can hear my companions speak and enjoy their conversation.  And there’s nothing wrong with that either.

Declined

On Friday, I finally blocked Humans of Tumblr in my Facebook feed.  It was a really good move and one I should have done year ago.  The stories showed up and they were all postings taken from the Am I The Asshole thread on Reddit.  However, HOT have copied and pasted those threads to their OWN page so if you click on the link to read the story, you go to HOT’s site, not Reddit.  Way to poach content to get clicks, huh?

Anyway, they post the link to their FB page and ask what you think about the situation, whatever it may be, and it always ends up in a feeding frenzy of people spouting judgment based on half-baked, highly biased information.  And the responses can get nasty.  Really nasty.

What I noticed most of all was that people seem incapable of arguing a point and resort to arguing the person.  Thus, instead of limiting their responses to comment on the topic, if they hear something they don’t like or someone dares to disagree with their point of view, they get really personal and start attacking the responder.  It’s ugly and vile.

There are far too many people out there who want to have their say but cannot handle anyone expressing a differing opinion. If another person dares to criticize THEIR response in any way, thing get very abusive, very fast.  

It’s even worse if your opinion y makes a valid point. Then the retaliation is always deeply personal and very cutting. If you haven’t got a really thick skin and cannot step back and see the whole situation with perspective, it’s easy to buy into the argument.  It’s so incredibly easy to forget that this is someone you don’t know, whom you will never meet, and whose opinion of you means nothing.  The need to respond to those being aggressive and/or the need to reiterate our point in order to ‘win’ can be overwhelming.  Then the real nastiness begins.   It’s awful to watch and horrific to be subjected to.

 And I’m tired of seeing it.  Even if I’m not a part of it myself, just seeing it in my feed is like being force fed broken glass.  It still has an impact on me and I find it upsetting and, in some cases, extremely triggering.  This is not good for my physical or emotional health.

So, I blocked the page. My well-being deserves no less.  

It wasn’t a planned choice.  I more or less noticed the latest post when I was scrolling through my general feed, started reading it and the posted replies, and realized how upset I was becoming.  Who needs that?

I have more than enough going on in my life to worry about without looking for extra dramas that are nothing to do with me in the first place. I don’t go to Reddit to look for these threads because I don’t want the drama.  Why should I allow it to be slipped under the radar at me via another source?

So, for once, I took action that will benefit me, and I really need to do more of that.  It’s time I listened to my body and how it reacts to situations and then take action to advocate on my own behalf.  If I find the bickering to be abusive and horrible to even watch, then it’s time to remove myself from that situation and head for happier ground.

It’s about self-care.  I think we all encounter these sorts of things, either on social media or in person, and just put up with it because we don’t realize the impact it’s having on us.  We’ve become so used to it that it’s the norm, not the exception. 

It doesn’t matter what the situation is, we always have one action we can take to make it better.  Leave.  

Just because someone else (or a lot of someone else’s) want to engage in drama and unhealthy bickering, doesn’t mean any of us have to join the party.  Thanks for the invitation to the fight, but I’ll have to extend my apologies and decline. 

And let me tell you, it’s very empowering and a huge relief.

Self-care takes many forms and, in this case, it’s noticing the reaction of my body to the stimuli and choosing a healthy response to it.  It’s high time I looked after myself better, but best late than never. Right?

The Goggomobile

One of the things I love about my job is the amount of work and challenge involved.  Some members of the team are totally office based, others are sometimes in the office and other times out on site.  A few work from home a couple of days a week.  Nobody is slacking.  Everyone has their nose to the grindstone and is getting on with making the magic happen.

There’s a lot of pressure involved at times. Last Friday, for example, I was just barely keeping up with what needed to be done and I certainly wasn’t getting anywhere near the 4 or 5 background projects of things I’m following up and developing. 

Nobody is a robot.  We all have times when we get frustrated or upset about things.  The difference between this team and any other I’ve worked with, is how we handle it.

There’s always a large amount of good-natured ribbing that goes on.  Someone will throw out a snark and someone else will toss back a corker of a reply, then it’s open season and everyone else just piles on and we all have a bloody good laugh.  It’s really healthy way of managing the issue and the laughter is great for team building.

It’s precisely for that reason that the company places more emphasis on the KIND of personality you are rather than your skill set.  Both are important but when things are a bit of a pressure cooker, it’s really vital to be able to laugh and bond with the team rather than be standoffish or easily offended. 

That ability to handle the occasional snark is vital.  It’s so constant that the ability take it on the chin and then toss it back a killer retort is just the life blood of the place.  

This week I’ve found myself reflecting on how much I laugh when I’m there.  It’s daily. It’s multiple times daily, really.  And it’s a life saver when we’re really pumping and everyone is feeling it.

Sometimes, the humour comes from the one liners, retorts and insanity that ensues.  Other times, it’s more organic.

Like Thursday, for example.

Fritz who is our front man to approach clients about contracts and the company negotiator for all that stuff, was on the phone to a new hot lead. I have to give him credit, he’s REALLY good at his job.

I also have to say that our office is very open and there is literally nowhere to have a private conversation.  Even if we whispered, everyone would still hear every word.  Consequently, he had a room of eavesdroppers listening to him work his magic.

Our side of the conversation went something like this: 

 “Yeah, why don’t we catch up for coffee to talk about it.  I’m Fritz from Business.”

“No. BUSINESS.”, repeated a little louder.

“BUSINESS.”, louder still and becoming emphatic.

“BUSINESS!”, almost shouting down the phone yet more emphatically and trying to keep the angst out of his voice.

“BU SI NE SS!”, louder, more emphatic and broken into syllables.

“BU SI NE SS!!!”, louder, more emphatic and broken into syllables and now said at snail’s pace for the IQ impaired.

“ BBBBB  UUUUUU  SSS    IIIII   NNNNN…….”, far more slow, much louder, more empathic and now literally being spelled out.

The rest of us had long ago dissolved into massive gales of laughter listening to this go down.

Then when Leader finally got off the phone, more than a little vexed, my service manager put the icing on the cake and said “gee ohh gee gee ohh…” referring to a commercial from the 90s which has long ago made its way into Australian culture. 

That did it.  We were all floored and screeching with laughter for the next five solid minutes.

It was one of those totally brilliant, delightful moments that is perfect in every way.

And that’s what makes working in this place so damned fantastic.

Suffocation

Childhood memories are made of strange fabric.  They’re either wispy and ethereal or solid as diamonds and crystal clear.  Given that’s the case, it’s truly amazing the things we choose to remember vividly and the myriad of moments we opt to push to the background and never recall.

One I often revisit is the number of times I had bronchitis growing up.  I would cop it at least 3-4 times a year and spend at least a week in bed each time.  It was just a misery.

I always knew when it was coming on because in the week leading up to a bout, I’d find myself becoming tired and breathless just walking from one room to another, and then it’d hit with full force and I couldn’t breathe at all, and not being able to breathe was the worst part of it. 

Every time I coughed, it was hollow and literally felt like something slammed into my back with massive force.  That was truly painful because I coughed hollow almost every 60 seconds.

Trying to move, even to roll over, was absolutely exhausting and left me little energy left to fight for air.

Mum used to prop me on several pillows so I was half raised because it made it easier to breathe but not by much.

Then when the pain got too much and I’d start to cry, she’d scold me and order me to stop immediately.  She wasn’t being unkind.  In fact, for all her failings, nursing us when we were sick was one of the times she really shone.

The bottom line was that when I was crying, my breathing was ragged and I was already fighting for air at the most regulated inhalation. I couldn’t afford for it to get irregular.  It didn’t make me feel any better though.

I remember Mum telling me that she had to rush me to hospital once when I was two because I couldn’t breathe and the doctors thought I had a collapsed lung.  Then I coughed up a huge amount of sheet phlegm and that eased the situation.

But, that was my entire childhood.  Having two heavy smokers in the house didn’t help.  By bedtime, there was a thick pall of smoke from the ceiling down to about 1 foot off the floor.  And I do mean thick. It was hard to see through because it was so heavy.  And I breathed in all that second hand smoke which really aggravated my asthma. 

Knowing they had a child in the house prone to lung issues didn’t’ stop either of them from chain smoking though.

My lung issues didn’t stop until a few months after I moved out of home in 1990.  It was about June and I had a really bad bout of bronchitis.  I was in bed for a week, but it was the last time I’ve ever had it.  It felt like a final purge of the toxic smoke I’d been breathing in all those years. 

And kissing that phase of my life goodbye was an absolute relief.  I’d never want to go through it again.

The one thing I do recall the most was the inability to breathe and how terrifying that was.  Literally not being able to draw in air or know where your next breath is coming from is the scariest thing in the world. 

In his final years with emphysema, I wonder if Dad realized what he’d actually done to me. He was hooked up to oxygen and still suffocated because his lungs were damaged.  I wonder if it scared him as much as it scared me back in the day.

There were a couple of times I had to call an ambulance for him while I still lived at home and I saw the panic in his eyes.  He and Mum had been fighting and he had become upset and his breathing had become irregular.  He couldn’t get enough oxygen and began to panic which made it worse.

I remember once, he was red faced and gasping and asked me to call and ambulance.  Mum was in the kitchen and said he was being silly.  I took charge and told her flatly, if he wanted an ambulance, he could have an ambulance.  She went quiet and looked at me like she might have gone too far but wasn’t going to admit it.

I moved the coffee table out of the way in the lounge, took a torch and went to the street to flag down the ambulance when they came so they’d know immediately which house we were in the street and wouldn’t have to waste time crawling along looking for numbers.

A bit of oxygen got him sorted out and all was well but I’m not sure what would have happened if I’d no been there because Mum wasn’t going to make that phone call and would only have done so if he was literally dying in front of her.

At least, I’d like to think she would have made the call.  I really can’t be 100% sure, and I find that disturbing.

I wonder what happened after I moved out.  He was already hooked up to oxygen tanks permanently by then so an ambulance wasn’t really needed, but I know she’d snipe and bitch at him to start a fight so she’d have an excuse to scream about something.  Anything.  It didn’t matter what.  She just liked to scream and rant.

But he wasn’t up to fighting anymore and I’m pretty sure she would have taken advantage of that to ‘win’ the battles.

Those two were just toxic together and yet, she wants to be buried with him.  If she died tomorrow, the last 31 years might be the only peace and quiet he’ll ever have.

Sometimes, thinking about them and their shitty, abusive relationship just takes my breath away.  And it hurts just as much as the hollow coughing I did when I had bronchitis.  Maybe more so.

The LC Crowd

I seem to be part of the long covid crowd and I’m not enjoying it.  Not one little bit.

I seem to have contracted Covid back in 2020 before there were RAT test or vaccines.  We were all in lockdown and I only went out when I wanted to grab groceries at the supermarket – or at the very least, admire the empty shelves.  It seems that was more than enough. 

I recall that I had a period there where everything suddenly tasted really terrible and I had no explanation for the alteration to my sense of taste.  I was eating the same things I always did.  They were made the same way they always had been.  They just tasted really awful and it stayed that way for about a week.

It wasn’t even limited to one or two things.  It was everything.  Even my cuppa tea tasted rancid and that was TOTALLY unfair.

I didn’t give it too much attention.  We were all in hard lockdown so I continued to isolate and see nobody.  I didn’t go past my front door, not even to the letterbox.  About a week later, I came good and it was all history.

Then the symptoms started.

The first one I noticed was feeling short of breath.  From my armchair in the lounge, it is exactly 11 steps to the kettle in the kitchen.  More often than not, I’m slumped over against the cupboards, struggling to suck in air by the time I get there.

I also noticed that I was losing air just walking around the mall which I found alarming and that, didn’t pass. It persisted and worsened.

Of course, I saw my doctor about it.  She was highly sceptical and seemed to think it was nothing to be concerned about.  After I prodded and insisted that something was wrong, she finally sent me for a lung function test.

When that came back normal, she again dismissed it as my being “out of shape” and needing to exercise.

I kept insisting and she sent me for a stress test.  That’s the one where they chuck you on a treadmill for about 10 minutes with increasing speed and angle so it’s more of a workout. The joy is that you get to do that while hooked up to all kinds of electrodes so they can monitor your heart while you’re on there.

My stress test was a bit of a non-event.  They took me to a small room to hook me up to the electrodes and then had me sit in the hall until they were ready for me.  When they called me in, I walked just 20 steps from the chair to the treadmill and had no oxygen by the time I got there. 

I hadn’t even set foot on the treadmill, let alone had it started, and I was already done.  The nurse and the doctor just looked at each other in horror saying they’d never had anyone where they couldn’t even get them on the treadmill at all.

I sat for about 5 full minutes recovering my air before they asked if I wanted to give it a go anyway. I did.  3 minutes later I was done.  They hadn’t gotten enough to give a conclusive verdict about my heart and recommended further investigation.

When I got back to my doctor with the results, or lack thereof, I was sure this whole thing would be taken seriously.  Nope.  I got more rhetoric about being overweight and how I needed to exercise more.

I pretty much gave up.  I mean, what do I have to do to be taken seriously here?  Have a heart attack on the doorstep?  It’s ridiculous.

Since then, more symptoms have emerged and I’ve been able to identify them due to more information about long covid being published.

There simply was no information in 2020.  We didn’t know about mostly asymptomatic covid and the damage it could do.  In fact, we’re STILL learning about the long-term damage from it.

What is clear is that I seem to have had it, been largely asymptomatic and am suffering worse now than I did at the time.

I am still breathless walking to the kitchen or anywhere for that matter.  I have to take things slowly and a lot of things that used to be easy, are now totally beyond me.

For example, I can use a broom to sweep the floor but using the dustpan is beyond me.  I cannot stoop over to use it.  I have to choose between oxygen and picking up the mess.  I choose the oxygen.

Housework is pretty much beyond me.  I am seriously considering hiring someone to come in for 2 hours once a week (or perhaps fortnight) to keep the place up to snuff.  You know, mop floors, vacuum, change the bed linen, clean the bathroom…  I can’t do that anymore.  I haven’t got the lung power.

I can become breathless just lying in bed if the blankets are too close to my mouth, or if my chin is low to my chest or even if neither of those things is the case but I need to roll over.  I can’t tell how scary it is to be just lying there, totally still, and suddenly need to gasp for air.

Technically, I should be looking at an alert button system so I can call for help if (and when) I am unable to get to a phone.  They’re not cheap and I can’t bring myself to go there because to me, they’re for old people. My grandma had a system like that.  So does my mother.  They were and are in their 80s for gods’ sake.  I figure I’m not due for an alert system for another 30 years and I won’t hear otherwise on the subject!

If the issues stopped there, I’d be grateful.  Alas, otherwise.

My hair has always been full. Not thick and luxurious.  Not cascades of glorious tresses.  But full.  It’s fine hair but there’s always been a fair bit of it.  Not anymore.  It’s now thin and has been falling out in droves.  What’s left is lanky and lifeless.  I’m almost ready to begin considering a wig to hide how horrible it’s become.

Apparently, hair loss is another long-covid joy but one which will grow back.  On the other hand, there is still a limited amount of knowledge about long-covid, so who knows what the real outcome will be?

Headaches are a daily occurrence.  They have been for years but they’re getting worse.  They’re stronger and more relentless.  I don’t turn to aspirin or other analgesics for relief.  I refuse and there’s a bit of a history behind that choice.

When I was 23, I took a fall down some icy steps while trying to put garbage outside in the bin.  I slipped on the top step, missed the next two, and landed in a squatting position on the pavement below.  Being a masochist, I went off to work regardless.  By the end of the day, my right knee was badly swollen, the pain was unbearable and I could barely walk.

I spent a couple of weeks on crutches and when that was done, I still had trouble walking.  Story of my life, I went to the outpatients at the hospital and the doctors there all had me hobble up and down the aisle for them.  Then they told me that I’d just forgotten how to walk properly.  Case closed.

Two years later, I couldn’t walk at all.  I was bent over like a button hook.  I had terrible pain in my back (upper and lower), my neck hurt, the headaches were killing me, and I couldn’t flatten my feet to put weight on them.  I had to walk on the sides of my feet because they were pinched so badly that they were literally pulled tight.  Picture walking on something hot and you clench your feet and toes.  Yeah.  That.  Except it was 24/7.

It took a decade of chiropractic treatment to sort that out.  At least the chiro did one thing none of the doctors at the outpatient clinic did – he looked at my hip instead of just my knee.  In fact, he x-rayed it which showed that I had, in fact, dislocated my right hip in that fall and had been walking around for those two years on a dislocated joint that had pulled my entire spine out of alignment.

That decade of treatment was torture.  I ended up chewing on painkillers of all kinds, both over the counter and prescription, before I finally decided that enough was enough. I was becoming addicted to the damn things and couldn’t make it through the day without them.  It was a nasty spiral to be riding and I decided to put a stop to it.

That’s when I began using self-hypnosis to manage my pain.  It worked fabulously.  I have used it for other things as well, but for keeping my pain under control, it’s my go-to remedy. It might not work for some, but it sure as hell works for me so I’ll use it. 

Thus, I have somewhat of an aversion to taking pain killers of any kind now.  It smacks of weakness and I’m always aware that it may be a thin end of a very wicked wedge to reach for the easy fix.  Even though the headaches and migraines I suffer currently are literally a 24/7 thing that never lets up for a second, I try to manage the pain with hypnosis rather than drugs. 

Alas, it’s not that way with other long-covid symptoms.  Nausea, for example.  I’m on medications for my diabetes that make me nauseous.  I thought I’d got that under control.  Then along came this which raises the art of the upset stomach to a grand master level. 

Mostly, I try to just deal with it and turn to drugs sparingly.  There have still been days when I’m literally chewing on Maxolon like it’s candy.  That tends to trigger my “addiction” anxieties so I try hard not to reach for it but I still keep it in the house just in case the nausea overwhelms me and my resolve crumbles.

While I don’t have the same level of brain fog that other sufferers have, I do find that I’m excessively tired.  I went out with a friend just last Thursday.  I was in the car driving for most of it.  I took her to do her early vote for the Federal election and then drove her to an interview.  I was out for maybe 3-4 hours, tops.  I fell into bed when I got home and slept through that night and most of the next day.  The exhaustion is out of control.

Other times, I’ve slept so much I can’t get to sleep at all and I’m up all night and into the next day.  It’s ridiculous.

While I’ve not had fever that I can detect, it’s hard to say.  I normally don’t feel the cold and walk around in summer clothes and bare feet all year round.  Not really so anymore.

In the last two weeks, I’ve again had my sense of taste go haywire and my body temperature has dropped.  Normal would be 36c but I’ve been hovering around 31c and this morning, when I noted how unusually cold I was, I whipped out the digital thermometer and pulled 27.5c.  That’s really low and I have no explanation for it. 

The fact that’s just 10c out is irrelevant.  I’ve been wandering around in light summer clothes for years with those temperatures and not felt in the least chilly.   In fact, I was wandering around in my light clothes just three weeks back and not feeling the cold.  Now, I am, although thankfully my sense of taste has returned because honestly, trying to down sour tasting coffee is a thoroughly miserable business.

I really don’t know what to do next.  I know I should go to the doctor and get that shortness of breath and tightness in my chest checked out.  On the other hand, I’m really not in the mood to hear about how I need to exercise more, yet AGAIN.

It’s not like I’m some morbidly obese person who needs a crane in order to lift them out of bed.  While my health could be better, it’s not as if I’m about to crack under the strain of mismanagement.

So, how DO you get taken seriously with a condition that we’re still finding out about?  Nobody knows how long it lasts or what the long-term outcomes will be.  For me, I’ve had this since late 2020 and it’s still going on.  Others only suffer the long symptoms for a few weeks or months.

I don’t know if my lungs have been damaged and if so, how badly.  I don’t know how much of my life I’m going to have to permanently kiss goodbye because I’m simply not up to it anymore.  I know things appear a bleak but nobody can tell me if this is it or if there’s room for things to get terribly worse.

Perhaps I have had covid a few times and been asymptomatic each time.  With this last change of taste, I did a RAT which came back with a negative result.  On the other hand, someone told me that she’d had covid and the RAT was negative and then a week later it finally gave a positive result. 

I’m just surfing the wave I’ve been given and hoping I reach shore eventually.  But I’m sure as hell not enjoying the ride.

Detonation

9 News released an article today (linked) about potential mandatory masking.  I posted about this myself just yesterday.  The article brief reads:

“The Australian Medical Association is pushing for the return of mask mandates, as COVID-19 and flu cases rise across the country.

It comes amid warnings that Australia is facing a tough winter, with doctors concerned that surging cases and booster hesitancy could create further stress for the healthcare system.”

Naturally they posted the link to the article on Facebook and wham, the place blew up.  While some people were quite accepting of the idea of wearing a mask again during a virulent season when people are sneezing and coughing, and we’re seeing a mix between Covid and flu emerging, others were quite rude and nasty.

Here are some examples.  Note that I have not redacted names because these posts were made to a public page on a public social media platform. As such, there is no expectation of privacy or confidentiality because it is an open PAGE on Facebook, not a private group.  If you post publicly, then you have no recourse when your words are quoted. 

Also note, I have copied and pasted directly.  Any grammatical or poor spelling belongs entirely to the original poster.

“Natalie McEachan:  Yes of course. Right before 194 countries give control to WHO on 22 – 28 May, will then control GLOBAL mandates on epidemics and health. Aussies did you vote for this. Was it ever a referendum issue that you were never consulted on. I refuse to hand over sovereignty to my right to WHO.

Krissy Simmons: Here we go again. News putting the feelers out to see what the population think about masks.  How about those who wish to wear masks can and the rest of us will live our lives. If masks work and those worried have one on they should be protected. I will not put a mask on again. No bloody way.

Ben Anderson:  We can’t keep on running for the masks every time we see an increase in cases we just need to get through it and move on

Rebecca Skeggs:  Just wait – as soon as this election is over get ready for the unnecessary government control yet again.

Gesthimani Mihailou:  How about who ever has microbiophobia stay home and leave us the rest alone to live a normal life.. Sounds like a great plan…

Kimberley Kharizma:  The major parties if you vote them back in will enforce them and worse.

Rosanna Pittari:  People who want to wear masks can but if you don’t stop pushing it ,we know what you are doing next it will be more lockdowns and telling us what to do leave us alone .”

Thankfully, not everyone felt this way but this kind of backlash is precisely what I expected.  Selfish, nasty, arrogant, bloody-minded bastards who don’t give a damn about the vulnerable and/or immunocompromised in the community.  As long as neither THEY nor anyone in THEIR little circle falls ill, it’s all fine and dandy. There is ZERO consideration for anyone else in these posts.

It’s all so damned SELFISH.  It’s a mask.  Nobody is being asked to surrender a body part.  Nobody is even suggesting that masks be worn at home, only in places with high traffic such as supermarkets, etc.

Instead of thinking about the people they might be infecting, these absolutely unforgivably vile bastards are thinking only of themselves.  It’s all “me me me me me”.

Our hospitals are already overcrowded with no beds available on wards or in emergency.  We have fewer ambulances available each shift, not only because of staffing shortages, but because ambulances are forced to ramp at hospitals for hours (some for their whole shift) because they cannot offload them to the hospital.  Why?  No beds because the hospital is overloaded.

And for some reason, these absolute morons think this is going to get SO much better during the height of the flu season.

The bottom line is that these bastards aren’t thinking of anyone but themselves.  Many of them bang on about how masking should be a PERSONAL choice.

Well, frankly, the PERSONAL DECISION of those who are elderly, vulnerable and immunocompromised in the community, is NOT to have these pricks put us at risk simply because they’re selfish, arrogant and have a vile, nasty, bloody-minded attitude. These people certainly DON’T have the right to wander around deliberately putting the most vulnerable in the community at risk – especially upon the basis of some wild conspiracy theory about Government control and/or sovereign rights being stolen by WHO.

In addition to these comments being outright self-centred and belligerent, I also noted that not ONE of them has proposed a BETTER solution to the issue.

Mandatory masking was suggested as a means to protect the community and help eliminate the possibility that the already overloaded medical system will collapse entirely.

I’m guessing that all the people quoted above, along with all the others I didn’t elect to include here, are all fit, healthy, robust individuals.  If they weren’t, they wouldn’t be making such foul statements.

Isn’t it nice to be in such a superior position and be able to superciliously dismiss the truly ill and vulnerable as dirt beneath their feet?  How wonderful it would be if we could all do so well at our yearly physical.

The fact is, we can’t.  There is a vast portion of the community who need their exposure curtailed because for them, it really IS life threatening.

But I suppose, if you’re a haughty, scum sucking bastard, you’ll just tell those people to stay home then and that it’s THEIR choice to set foot out of doors.

Well, it’s not their choice to be somewhere public and have someone who is asymptomatic close to them and giving them a virus their body simply cannot handle.

And don’t give me that vulgar line about “it’s OUR right to be out in public and we can go where we want” complete with flailing fists and stamping feet. 

It is the right of the vulnerable and immunocompromised to be out in public spaces too and to be safe there.    

All anyone is suggesting is that we all do our little bit to help keep a bad situation under control so that we can ALL benefit. You know, just be decent, thoughtful and considerate people.

Apparently, that’s far too much to ask for some, and doesn’t that say a massive amount about precisely what kind of genuinely disgusting, low-life scum they really are.  Mind you, if THEY get sick, whole other story, huh?

Dear Anti-Vaxer

You might think you’re so RIGHT and so rock solid in your beliefs. Let’s see what happens when either you or your children become seriously sick. Then we’ll find out if you have the genuine conviction of your purported beliefs of if your just an hypocritical, drama loving, trouble making bastard.

If you don’t believe in medical science, you’ll be only too happy to resort to homeopathic remedies while you or your children are struggling for every breath. You won’t be calling for a doctor, let alone an ambulance, will you?  Now, if that’s your chosen route, don’t whine when it works out badly.  You CHOSE it.

If you ARE an hypocritical, drama loving, trouble making bastard, well, as soon as the shit hits the fan, it’ll be an ambulance on speed dial and off to hospital demanding quick treatment along with a lot of abusive violence and screaming if there’s no ventilator available for YOUR case.

You cannot have it both ways. If you don’t believe in vaccination, fine.  You’ve had all the information at your disposal and for over a year, you’ve had the empirical evidence. You’ve still opted not to proceed with a vaccination.  Live your life and suffer the consequences of YOUR choices.  AND STUT UP ABOUT IT.

However, you have ZERO permission to whine and complain to all and sundry about how those choices pan out.  If it end up a bad deal, nobody cares to listen to complaining and whining, and frankly, there is NO sympathy for you.  You made that choice. Suck it up and deal with it when it turns out cactus the way GROWN UPS do.

For the time being, regarding the incessant fanfare about the dangers of vaccination, keep your FUCKING opinion to yourself and STOP ramming them down everyone else’s throat.

You do NOT have the right to harangue others because they don’t believe as you do, let alone make choices for THEIR bodies because you don’t like the ones THEY want to make.

When YOU HAVE to live in THEIR body, fine, you can have an opinion. Until then, you’re just a trouble making bastard running around abusing others because YOU’RE arrogant enough to think YOU’RE so RIGHT and the absolute authority on the subject and everyone HAS to listen to YOU and abide by YOUR wishes.

Who the fuck died and made you GOD?

Who gave YOU the right to ram your dictatorship down the throat of other people and try to get your own way by either browbeating them or emotionally manipulating them?

If you genuinely believe that vaccination does nothing and AREN’T an egotistical, trouble making bastard; I’d like to see how fast you run for a tetanus shot when you’ve been scratched by an animal or by rusty wire and are at genuine risk of sepsis in your blood. Are YOU willing to let it slide and risk lockjaw and death?

I’ll bet any amount of money you won’t.  Hell, no!  When it’s YOUR butt in the sling, you’ll be off to get a jab faster than the eye can see!  If it’s one of your kids, it’ll be even faster.

And you won’t be parroting any anti-vax propaganda then, will you?  In fact, if you ever let yourself admit it, deep down you’ll be grateful there’s a vaccination you can have because 200 years ago, an animal bite or scratch was a guaranteed death sentence once you began showing symptoms.

Covid vaccinations are absolutely NO DIFFERENT. It’s a preventative and one which the majority of us choose to enjoy.

If YOU don’t want it, go live on a fucking island and take your narrow minded, egotistical and arrogant opinions with you.  STOP trying to shove YOUR opinions onto others and prevent those people from making their own choices.  Just because YOU don’t want a vaccination doesn’t mean nobody ELSE is allowed to have one.

In case you haven’t noticed, we DO have the right to freedom of choice in this society without being browbeaten and abused for making a choice YOU don’t approve of.

You expect others to respect YOUR choices.  That goes two ways though.  If you refuse to respect others, then don’t get on your high and mighty throne and start whining when others don’t respect YOU.

Now, take your anti-vaxing shit and shut the fuck up.  Period.

Nobody wants to hear it and frankly, we’ll all fed up to the back teeth with listening to the lot of you banging on about it every time the subject of vaccination is mentioned in any way, shape or form.

Make your choice and be a grown up about it.  Suck it up and just deal with it if you end up in a situation that’s phenomenally bad.

You seriously cannot expect others to come running with their ready sympathy when you’ve been abusing shit out of them for their choices all this time.  It’s not reasonable, moral or even sane.

If you have gotten to the end of this diatribe and still can’t grasp what I’m saying or simply can’t HANDLE what I’m saying, then get yourself a therapist that will be paid to listen to your whining and egotistical ranting.

None of us are interested in hearing it and none of us care.  I have just five words for you:

Shut up and fuck off.

Thunderstorm Asthma Warning

They are warning us that we’re in for a bad season of Thunderstorm Asthma. The conditions are much the same as they were in 2016 when we had the last tone.

if you use a Ventolin (even infrequently) NOW is the time to get one and have it with you. I was on the hospital switchboard when the last one hit and I haven’t got words for how many calls we had from idiots that thought they could just swing by, pick up a Ventolin and head off. No, you can’t.

It is up to YOU to make sure you have the medication you need ahead of time. Waiting until you cannot breathe is pointless and dangerous. Personal responsibility is everything.

If you choose to blow it off and take the “wait and see” approach, then you will have to wear the consequences if it blows up in your face.

Whining and complaining because you don’t have what you need when you snap your fingers, is NOT allowed. If you create the problem, suck it up and deal with it when it blows up in your face.

Nor is blaming everyone else from the top government, to the ambulance services to great aunt Bessie down the road.

YOU know what medication you need and it’s up to YOU to make sure you have it. Failure to do so is YOUR irresponsible mishandling of the situation. Not someone else’s.

The hard facts:

If you go to a hospital, they can treat you as a patient but they cannot dispense medication like a pharmacy. You will just have to wait and you’ll be there for over 2 hours once you are admitted to the ER. That does not include time in chairs waiting to be seen

There are no pharmacies open overnight in Melbourne. If you need a Ventolin, get it NOW. Supplies may run low due to demand. You’re the one that needs it. Take ownership of that and equip yourself accordingly.

Last time, the ambulance service was swamped and the wait time for a unit was over 5 hours. With Covid patients also struggling to breathe (and being exacerbated by the weather) the wait time could blow out to over 8+ hours.

Taxi services were swamped also. If you’re likely to need a hospital, prepare ahead of time how you’re going to get there. If you hvve no means of transportation, get a Ventolin and talk to friends & family about help if you need it.

With so many Covid patients taking up beds in hospitals, there may be lengthy wait times to be seen. The wait time for ambulances to offload patients is already hours long. It’ll be worse during an asthma event. It could be 3-5 hours before you even get INTO a hospital from an ambulance, let alone be seen by anyone.

Dear Anti-Vaxxers

Dear Anti-Vaxxers,

The vaccine has landed and it’s time for you to step up and do right by everyone else, instead of sitting on your high horse and criticizing the rest of us who are behaving responsibly.

In fact, anti-vaxxer arseholes, since living among the unenlightened and disease prone among us, you may begin moving to an isolated area of Australia, effective immediately. When you arrive there, please ensure you never come back unless you have had ALL necessary vaccinations and can prove it.

The majority of the community are doing the right thing and should not have to live in a society where you RELY on all of US to get vaccinated so you don’t have to.

You are perfectly happy to bang on about being “worried about side effects” and not placing yourself “at risk” as long as the rest of us DO take those risks.

Should any of us have side effects from any vaccination, however mild, you’ll be the first ones to cluck and trumpet how RIGHT you were. It’s a response stemming from fear and ignorance, thus your decision not to vaccinate is just plain cowardice.

Let’s be clear. You are only living a safe, disease free life because those around you HAVE been vaccinated.  Not because the human immune system is up to providing full protection against all diseases.

You are out there living your luxurious anti-jab life, denigrating those who do vaccinate and acting superior to the rest of the community, but doing so entirely at OUR expense.

It’s selfish, arrogant, entitled and just sheer bloody minded. In fact, it’s a form of bullying.

I’ve noticed however, that anti-vaxxers are only too happy to take full advantage of the medical care available when something goes wrong.

If someone breaks a bone, they call an ambulance and seek treatment at a hospital.

If someone develops cataracts, they’re only too happy to see a specialist and get laser treatment for it.

If someone develops cancer, oh you BET they’re hot to trot to see an oncologist and undergo surgery or chemotherapy, or both.

Where did all those high-handed opinions about how the human body doesn’t need any of that stuff go?

The bottom line is that WE are keeping YOU safe.  We deserve the same respect back from you.  You are safe because we acted responsibly.  We are in danger because you refuse to.

We just don’t deserve to be placed at risk because of your filthy and irresponsible decisions around health care.  If you don’t have our backs but expect us to have yours, then you haven’t earned the RIGHT to live amongst us.

You live in a COMMUNITY. You are NOT an island. You have a moral and ethical obligation to act for the best outcome for EVERYONE, not just YOU.

If you haven’t got the decency, or the courage, to get the jab, please go and live some place where WE don’t have to risk catching YOUR germs and infections. 

I’ll bet you’ll be taking along doctors, medical equipment and any number of established drugs with you though.  You haven’t got the courage of your convictions to leave them behind!  And in times of trouble, you’ll be the first ones screaming out for the best medical care.

For the decent and responsible among the community here in Australia, the vaccine has landed and the roll out plan starts next Monday, February 22.

Front up. This really IS life and death and nobody should be placed at further risk because someone doesn’t want to do their part.